When No Means No!

I’m not a rude person (my friends would be amused to say otherwise though. Time and a place though, people!) but it’s got to the point these days where I feel as though I have had no choice but to verbally lash people who don’t seem to get it that when I say “No Thank you” It does not mean “I am incapable of making decisions for myself, so please ignore my answer and decide for me”.

A prime example of this is when I go for drinks with people. Now I do like drinking however I know when I have had enough or if I’m not drinking, I stick to my guns and stay completely sober. I’m not sure if I give off the vibe that infers I am completely indecisive or easily swayed but I am forever having to say no thanks to being continually offered a drink.

Person A: ”Would you like a drink?”

Me:“No Thanks!”

Person A: “Here, I’ll get you one...”

Me: “No I’m good.. don’t worry about it”

Person A: “ Are you sure? I’ll go get it”

Me: “No thanks, I’m fine”

Now.. repeat this situation another 4 times.. WITH THE SAME PERSON...

Person A: ”I’ll get you a drink”

Me:“I’m fine.. I’m driving!”

Person A: “Here, I’ll get you one...”

Me: “I said I’m driving”

Person A: “ Are you sure?”

Me: “Do you understand English? Because clearly you are not grasping the concept of my not drinking because I am driving.”

The people who know me would tell you that I don’t drink often and that is mainly because I like to drive home and I prefer to not have a seedy day after. I realise that these people are more than likely trying to be nice but there comes a point where being nice moves into being flat out annoying and ignorant. Understand that I don’t want to be rude to you, I just want to be able to enjoy my non-alcoholic beverage and not have to repeat myself ad nauseam. I can only dread what that poor Becky had to go through when she told all her friends that she wasn’t drinking that night. (for those not in the loop - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIe9KGAJeko)

It does not stop with drinking though. Some people just don’t seem to get that asking the same question over and over again will not change the answer. I am a 30 year old man and did you know that I have made it this far in my life by making my own decisions and sticking to them? Crazy, I know. Did you also know that when I answer a question without a hint of hesitation, this should not be translated to “You know what? I have no idea. Why don’t you ask me again and I may actually answer the question how you want”.

Yes. It probably sounds like I am being melodramatic but look at it this way – if you ignore my first (and more than likely resounding) answer, it’s a form of disrespect in my eyes. Having to do this multiple times becomes horribly droll, irritating and taxing on my patience. By all means though, if you ask me something and I seem unsure, go ahead and ask again or guide me in a certain direction but when I make my decision, respect it and move on. I don’t want to put on my “I’m going to tear your eyeballs out if you keep pestering me” face.